A night of discipline

Tonight was tough for Brandon Bear.

He had a fun time in the bath and I didn't even care when he splashed. I actually joined him in the splashing fun and got all wet myself. He did want to stand up often and we had some chats about keeping his butt in the water.

After bath time we played "Hide the wenis" We try to make putting the diaper back on fun when a little boy gets out of the tub and starts running around nakey. Once the diaper was on and the 'wenis' was hidden (thank goodness) we did jammies and tried to play quietly in the living room and watch the Twins.

Brandon wanted to play with the tv. This is one thing we are very strict on and do NOT let him do. He first wants to turn the tv on and off and then bang on the screen. He gets one quiet, eye level warning. He rarely obeys and does it again. When he does that we visit the 'time out wall'. This is the spot at the end of the upstairs hallway. He sits there for one minute. I usually sit with him making no eye contact and usually holding him so he doesn't run. This is teaching him that he needs to stay in time out and that mom means business- this isn't fun and play time but time to think about his actions, calm down, re-group and continue with the evening. Tonight he got 3 of these and he screamed through 2 of them. We use the end of the hallway because we don't want to do his room or crib because that is where he sleeps and it is a peaceful place. We don't want to do a time out on our lap in the living room since that is where the action is and he needs to be removed from the action. And we are working on making mommy and daddy's room a special room to be in so we don't want to do it there either.

Once his time is up I look right at him on eye level and tell him the same thing every time, "Brandon, your time out is up. The reason why you were in time out is because you did not listen to mommy and daddy and you hit the television. We don't hit the television. The next time you hit the television you will be in time out again. I love you very much." Then I give him lots of hugs and kisses so he knows we love him and care about him and then we go play. Tonight it took him some time to get back in to the 'play' thing again. He wanted to sit in the middle of the hall and cry. After attempting to engage him and it not working I just went in the living room and started to play and he eventually joined in.

After the third time of time outs and television hitting I was getting exhausetd (this was all in less than 10 minutes). There was a second of thought thinking if I just slap his hands lightly won't he get the picture! NOPE! He won't and most likely he will just keep hitting the tv and other things and people. Rob and I were spanked growing up but we have agreed to not spank our kids. So far- so good. It is hard to be consistant and dedicated to discipline. The hard part for me is it being 8pm and night in lots of back pain and having to move up and down from floor to recliner to standing. It makes me sound lazy but evening time is very painful and moving exhausts everything.

As for discipline- we will continue to work on it. I felt bad that he was crying and it seemed like the world was ending but I didn't give up. I won't give up. We are committed to raising well behaved kids and we are dedicated to the journey no matter how hard or easy it may be. We do re-direct him often. After time out we start a different play item and when he gets his first warning we redirect him as well.

Many folks have thought I am nuts for starting to discipline him at only one year old. To that I reply....he is much smarter than you or I know. He knows yes and no...he knows how to ask for things without speaking...he knows he isn't supposed to bang the tv and that when he does he will get a reaction out of it. We have to start somewhere and right now discipling him for one thing (The tv) is exactly what we should be doing.

It actually reminds me a bit of when I was managing the Alzheimers unit and I would tell everyone- our residents are smater than we give them credit for. They do know what is going on from time to time. I do believe that.