As a mom I knew I was going to say some crazy things like, "Don't put that up your nose." But I am surprised at some things I have been saying lately.
"Don't pee on Daddy's shoes."
"Bobby pins go in Mommy's hair, not my eyes."
"Toothbrushes don't get flushed down the toilet."
"Honey, Mommy's tattoo doesn't come off. It will be on there forever so please stop trying to pull it off my skin. That hurts."
"Lotion does not go in your ears, eyes, nose, or your mouth....Go ahead and have a tantrum but someday you will thank me for not letting you put lotion in your eyes."
"Where did you find Mommy's camera? NO, you may not take my photo right now, I am naked."
"Can I please have my underwear back?"
"Your mittens don't fit on Mommy's ears."
"Boys don't wear bras. At least, most boys don't wear bras."
"You may not squeeze the cat to death. His eyes will pop out and that is gross."
"Cat food it NOT for you. It is for cats so please take it out of your mouth."
"Little boy hands do not belong in the toilet."
"Stop licking the grocery cart."
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